And then at other times

I realise this is ridiculous, someone who knows me will find this blog eventually and it won't be my personal release anymore. It won't be my account of everyday because it will be influenced by something other than just me.

I like the fact that there are pretty girls all over the world that are awake and online right now, while I'm sitting here with bags under my eyes and waiting for sleep. I like knowing that while we're in darkness, the other half of the world is in bright light. enduring bright light. this morning I was woken up by someone shining a 100 watt lightbulb in my face. obviously, it wasn't just the lightbulb, it was screwed into a lamp but that's beside the point. The place where there is no darkness double meanings. I spent too long considering that this morning. I always say I prefer night because I do; but I couldn't bear it eternally. I don't really know why I try to explain the hidden sides of me to people who know me well enough already. I guess that doesn't satisfy me. There are some friends I just need to know me like the back of their hands, so that one day they can look back on the good times and know they had a friendship that was real and true. I need sleep define need.